How to Recognize Foolish Behavior — And Protect Your Heart God’s Way
- Kate Ferrill
- Apr 16
- 3 min read
“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”
– Proverbs 13:20
As women of faith, many of us have been taught to extend grace, to forgive endlessly, and to love without limits. And while these are beautiful, Christ-centered principles, we must also remember that Scripture does not call us to endure the chaos or harm caused by someone living in foolishness.
In fact, God gives us both wisdom and boundaries—not to close our hearts, but to protect them.
What Does Foolishness Look Like?
The Bible describes a foolish person not just as someone who makes mistakes (we all do!), but as someone who rejects wisdom, correction, and accountability. Foolishness in Scripture is often tied to pride, impulsiveness, manipulation, and a lack of fear of the Lord.
Here are a few red flags of foolish behavior:
They ignore wise counsel. (Proverbs 1:7)
They stir up strife and drama. (Proverbs 29:11)
They blame others instead of taking ownership. (Proverbs 19:3)
They twist truth to serve their own desires. (2 Timothy 4:3-4)
They keep repeating destructive patterns. (Proverbs 26:11)
Foolishness can show up in romantic relationships, friendships, family, and even church dynamics. And while we are called to love others, we are not called to enable or entangle ourselves with patterns that rob us of peace, clarity, or safety.
How God Teaches Us to Protect Ourselves
God never asks His daughters to stay stuck in confusion or emotional harm. He equips us with discernment and shows us how to guard our hearts—not out of fear, but out of faith.
Here’s how Scripture leads us:
Use Discernment Over Emotion
“Be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.” – Matthew 10:16
You can love someone and still step back from their behavior. Don’t let emotional guilt override spiritual wisdom.
Watch for their "fruit" or behavior
“You will know them by their fruits.” – Matthew 7:16.
Is this person bearing the fruit of the Spirit—love, peace, patience—or are they sowing confusion and control? The fruit always tells the truth.
Set Healthy, God-Honoring Boundaries
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” – Proverbs 4:23
Boundaries are biblical. They aren’t walls to shut people out—they are gates of wisdom that help you protect what’s holy in your life.
4. Ask God for Clarity and Courage
“If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God… and it will be given.” – James 1:5
When you feel unsure, overwhelmed, or guilty for noticing someone’s harmful behavior, pause and pray. God wants to give you clarity. You are not alone in your discernment.
Friend, if your heart feels torn between showing grace and protecting yourself, know this: God can help you do both. You were never meant to carry the burden of someone else’s foolish choices.
Wisdom does not mean walking in bitterness—it means walking in truth, led by the Spirit, free from fear. And when you create space from foolishness, you create room for peace, healing, and God’s best in your life.
Here's a few things for you to journal through this week...
Have you been ignoring red flags in someone’s behavior because you're afraid of conflict?
What fruit is this relationship producing in your life—peace or chaos?
How is God inviting you to walk in wisdom right now?
Need help sorting through it? Connect with us for a free 15-minute conversation.